'Mo Privacy, 'Mo Problem.

In a city of 10 or so million people, one needs to let go of their personal bubble very quickly. Coming to Beijing, I was fully prepared for being constantly pressed up against strangers on buses and trains; and everyday having to file into and out of chaotic metro and bus transfer stations under conditions of what one might expect at the Edmonton-Coliseum station post-Oilers game – except with a business casual crowd that's less rowdy and inebriated.

However, I had forgotten that one needs to be literally prepared to be comfortable in one's own skin – as in to be seen ONLY in one's own skin. Among people of the same gender, there's no concept of the need for privacy. I have two illustrations of this.

This past weekend, I was staying over with an aunt and the temperature was sweltering (over 30C and humid) well into the evening. Around 8 pm, auntie says, "Take a shower, it'll help you cool off." Now, before I go further, I need to explain that a washroom in the typical middle-class high-rise apartment in Beijing is small, perhaps just 2 m X 2 m, and consists pretty much of a toilet, sink and a shower head mounted on one of the walls. One wouldn't take anything into the washroom during a shower that one doesn't want to get wet. My usual method at home is to undress in my room, cover up with a towel, race to the washroom, swing my towel over one of the various wires strung up between the pipes along the opposite corner as the shower head and then… well shower.

"Auntie, can I get a towel please?"
"Sure", she says and passes me a little thing that's about the same size as the typical dish cloth. As I stared at the towel and pondered how one can possibly physically maintain their modesty with it, she says, "Just change here." HERE - as in in the main hallway/reception area of her small, 400 sq. feet apartment, which by the way, also doubles as a study/dining/laundry area. So what can an obedient niece do but comply, and I mean it really shouldn't be a big deal considering there weren't any males in the house.

Now for le deuxieme example, a few days ago, I was at a little boutique and wanted to try on some dresses. As the sales girl directs me to the store's one and only fitting room, we see another customer just slipping in. So what does any normal Canadian gal do? Stand by the fitting room and wait of course. What does the sales girl do? She knocks on the door and announces, "Hey miss, you're going to have to share the fitting room with someone okay?" She doesn't wait for a reply, opens the door and tells me "Okay, go in." I myself being such a sheep, again comply and as I'm sharing the fitting room with this lovely stranger, I convince myself it's not thaaat weeeird; it's just like the first time I was in the locker room in 7th grade gym class right?

So there you had it – my first few anecdotes from Beijing, as perceived from the eyes of a semi-/quasi foreigner.

I didn't end up buying anything from that store; perhaps I was protesting their lack of a privacy policy and well… also that their clothes were only designed for women who weigh 100Ibs and are pre-pubescently thin!